“I will not allow anyone~especially the abuser~to tell me who I am!”~Source Unknown
“The love of a brother for a sister, especially a spiritual sister, is not just some official emotion, “I love you.” Real love, real manhood says, “No one is going to hurt this woman! Especially me.”~Ron Hutchcraft
“When you allow yourself to be dominated by someone else, you begin to lose respect for yourself. You become silently enraged, both at the person who is dominating you and at yourself for allowing the domination. Someone else is in control of your life, just as assuredly as if you were a slave obeying orders. Stop doing this to yourself!’~Source Unknown
“In violence we forget who we are.”~Mary McCarthy
“Reflect on how much pain you’ve suffered, and remember your abuser’s broken promises. Consider the fear you feel and how your children are being affected. Gather your courage to take action. Realize that God offers you real hope for a life free of abuse. Take stock of trustworthy people with whom you may safely share your story. Start by telling one person as soon as you can. Then reach out to others so you’re not relying just one person to meet all your needs.”~Whitney Hopler
“If you are in an emotionally abusive relationship, you have no doubt experienced “honeymoon” periods in the past when, driven by remorse, he seemed to change and everything was fine. The following will help you know that your partner is in the process of permanent change. You will feel that he consistently (every day): • Values and appreciates you—you are important to him; • Listens to you; • Shows compassion—cares how you feel, even when you disagree with him; • Respects you as an equal and doesn’t try to control you or dismiss your opinions; • Shows affection without always expecting sex; • Regulates his guilt, shame, anxiety, resentment or anger, without blaming them on you.”~Dr Steven Stosny
“The attacks of which I have been the object have broken the spring of life in me… People don’t realize what it feels like to be constantly insulted.”~Edouard Manet
“The next time the abuser tells you that the reason he is abusive towards you is something you have done, remind yourself that no one is ever responsible for another person’s actions. The next time the abuser tells you that he wouldn’t get so angry with you if you would just try harder, remind yourself of how hard you have been trying and how little effect your efforts have had on his actions. And most important, the next time you are lying in bed crying over something the abuser has said or done, remind yourself of who you were before you met him.”~Source Unknown
“Leaving an abusive partner is a very difficult thing to do. It frequently feels like you are failing, or destroying your family, or not trying to work things out, or not giving your partner “a second chance.” It hurts, and it’s scary.” ~ Blaine Nelson
“When you are with someone who is never pleased, it is time to stop trying to please him.”~Source Unknown
“Often things are as bad as they seem.”~ Sheldon Kopp
“Do not allow him~the abuser~tell you who you are or take the blame for his actions.”~Source Unknown
“You have the right to your own ideas and opinions, to make your own decisions, and to have things go your way at times. Stand up for those rights.”~ Beverly Engel
“You may sometimes think that you are just feeling sorry for yourself or that you are making a big deal out of nothing. But emotional abuse is a BIG deal. It is something serious.”~Source Unknown
“…those serpents! There’s no pleasing them!”~ Lewis Carroll
“You’ve given him the benefit of the doubt long enough.
Now it’s time to give yourself the benefit of the truth.”~Source Unknown
“There is no deeper wound than humiliation. The momentary glory we may feel in humiliating someone is short-lived compared to the damage we cause.”
~Irwin Katsof
“As painful as it is to admit that we are being abused, it is even more painful to come to the conclusion that the person we love is someone we cannot afford to be around.”~Source Unknown
“Sticks and stones may break my bones,
but words will make me go in a corner and cry by myself for hours.”~Eric Idle
“Real courage owns up to the fact that we face a terrifying task, admitting that we are appropriately frightened, identifying sources of help and strength outside and within ourselves, and then going ahead and doing what needs to be done.”~Dr. Alla Renne Bozarth
“…if the abuse is severe and occurring within the marriage relationship, it’s time to take bold steps and assert biblical, healthy boundaries.”~Mary J. Yerkes
“A word from the mouth is like a stone from a sling.”~Spanish Proverb
“Injuries from verbal and emotional abuse can run deep and leave lasting scars. Many emotionally and verbally abused people reason that, because there are no bruises or broken bones, their abuse must not be serious. But it is. …If pain motivates you to act against emotional and verbal abuse, then listen and act. You may be saving more than your life. “~Beth J. Lueders
“Though prevalent in our culture, verbal abuse often goes unrecognized because it leaves invisible scars. The abusers often come across as nice, even charming, people when they interact with the general public. But behind closed doors, they use cutting words to exert control over those closest to them. And they do it by sending a two-sided message: “I love you… but I don’t.”” ~Holly Hudson
“The language we use to communicate with one another is like a knife. In the hands of a careful and skilled surgeon, a knife can work to do great good. But in the hands of a careless or ignorant person, a knife can cause great harm.”
Exactly as it is with our words.”
~Source Unknown
“Whether overt or silent, all forms of abuse are failures of compassion; he stops caring about how you feel.”~Steven Stosny
“The hallmarks of an abuser — both verbal and physical — include jealousy, a need to control, efforts to isolate their partner or relative, attempts to rush a romantic relationship and disrespect for privacy and personal boundaries. Drug and alcohol abuse are often present in the situation.”~Holly Hudson
“If someone loves you, it should feel like they love you.”~Source Unknown
“Most people think “abuse” is just physical attacks such as hitting, punching, kicking, pulling hair, twisting limbs, pinching, slapping, biting, etc. There are many other type of abusive behavior which hurt just as much or more than physical abuse. Just because an abuser stops hitting his spouse doesn’t mean he has stopped being abusive.”~Brenda Branson
“There is not such thing as only being emotionally abused – I have heard many horrifying stories of physical abuse and the most damaging aspect of the physical abuse is the emotional abuse it causes – when we say “I was only emotionally abused” it is the disease minimizing the trauma we experienced. Emotional abuse is underneath all other types of abuse – the most damaging aspect of physical, sexual, mental, etc. abuse is the trauma to our hearts and souls from being betrayed by the people that we love and trust. The other types of abuse can add more levels to the healing necessary but the bottom line is the emotional abuse and it’s effect on our ability to Love and trust ourselves. In fact, being only emotionally abused can sometimes make it much harder to get in touch with our issues because it isn’t always blatant and obvious. Some of it was very subtle – some of us were abused and shamed by the way they looked at us or said our name or did not see or hear us – on a daily basis.”~Source Unknown
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